So let me begin by saying the past 2 months have been crazy busy. We'll start with November. Not much happened at first. I was enjoying being back at Latham, we had a wonderful Thanksgiving with my mom's family. Overally, November was a great month--aside from me freaking out about December. lol. We spent every moment we had just trying to enjoy each other's company and spend the last few weeks together. Thanksgiving came and went--and then IRON BOWL SATURDAY! (ROLL TIDE). lol. We spent the day at Daniel's parents watching the Iron Bowl, enjoying extremely fattening food (haha), and talking. Then at halftime, we were presented with our Christmas presents from them--new phones! They wanted us to have a reliable way to talk to each other while he was at BMT--so we took a trip to Verizon and got us set up on new phones and our own plan (for the first time since we were married!). That was a blessing and a half! We were thrilled!
After that weekend, we had a week of reprieve. That last week of November was Daniel's last week at Kohl's, and he was SO ready to be done by Friday. On December 1st, we went and ate dinner with a very special family that is so close to our hearts. Jon Jones, Daniel's bible teacher from MA, has been so amazing and a big part of our lives since we got married. I wish we were able to see him more often than we were, but both of our busy schedules made that difficult. He was such a blessing to us! We enjoyed chatting, a great meal, and lots of discussions about the coming weeks. On December 2nd, we enjoyed Christmas at my dad's parents' house. This was huge for me. I spent the last 2 months planning and trying to make sure we got EVERYONE together. This was the first time we got together with my aunt and uncle in several years. Actually...since my wedding 3 years ago. It was great for all of us to spend that time together exchanging gifts AND Daniel and I ended up getting enough money for Christmas for us to take a trip for our anniversary. HUGE blessing. We spent the rest of that week just kinda planning our trip when I was home, spending time together when I was off work, and talking. December 8th, we had Christmas at Daniel's aunt's house and had so much fun. A lot more talking about him leaving, a lot more laughs, a lot of great fattening foods (of which every party is nothing short of! lol) and just spending time with family.
We left for our trip on December 9th. We were SO incredibly blessed to have been able to take this trip. We had 3 nights and 4 days down in Biloxi, MS. You may think "why there?!?" It is a BEAUTIFUL area, plus theres an AFB about 5 minutes from the hotel we stayed at...and I wanted Daniel to get an idea of what we might have in store for us in the future! Plus, because it was the off season, we got it at a fantastic price! Every moment of it was spent holding hands, lounging in the bed, or just enjoying being ourselves. After living with my family for so long (much longer than we expected) it was a MUCH needed break. Now, i'm not saying I'm ungrateful for what my parents have done for us, we are SO thankful because without their help we would have been out on the streets. But we needed that alone time right before he left. I thank God every day for that trip because it gave both of us something to look back on over these 8.5 weeks that he is gone. We spent more money than we ever have, drank more than we should have (but enjoyed it!), ate a TON of food, and were completely and utterly lazy and happy. Best. Trip. I've. Ever. Had. I think it was because he was leaving in a few days and the fact of that looming over our heads just made it THAT MUCH MORE precious.
When we got back to town, we spent the remaining 4 days together. We went to his parents and stayed there for a couple nights so that we could all spend a few more days together before he left. I wish we could have stayed in Biloxi till he left. lol. It was fun, but i miss that trip more than anything. More importantly I miss my husband. terribly.
The day he left? I actually did surprisingly well. I was expecting to break down completely and not be able to dirve and all that stuff. But no, i held his hand and was right by his side from the time we got to the recruiter to the time he left my side to get on the bus. My father-in-law took an amazing picture (the one as the background of my blog right now) of our last kiss before he got on the bus. I bawled when I saw that picture. I did really well the rest of that day....the only time i lost it was that night when he facetimed me. All day I was like "oh he's just at MEPS, we can talk...he'll be back tomorrow" and then as it would dawn on me that i'm not gonna see him or hold him for 8.5 weeks, i'd start to lose it. That first night was easy because he could talk to me, we facetimed for a bit on our phones (basically like skype)...then went to bed. The next day was a little harder because he wasn't able to talk as much, but he was still able to talk here and there to let me know certain flights landed, or that he got moved to a different flight, that he passed his medical exam and all that stuff. Then that second night came and he had a 30 second phone call to tell me that he had landed at SAT and that he was okay and that he would "call later with more information." I just barely squeezed out "Happy Anniversary..." as he hung up. Oh yeah, did I mention the day he actually started BMT at Lackland was our 3rd Anniversary?! Thanks USAF, really appreciate it. lol.
I woke up the next morning, with 2 hours of sleep nonetheless, to a voicemail from Daniel with his address and i bawled my eyes out. I said happy anniversary to the phone about a million times...that and I love you. and I miss you. and all that. I know he couldn't hear me, that didn't make me say it any less. lol. I had a REALLY rough time that day. By the time I got to work at 1230, I was like a zombie... emotionally drained... really completely drained. I had cried most the morning with my brother trying to comfort me (i was SO thankful he got in Tuesday night with my mom being out of town)...and i basically stopped just long enough to go to work. I put his Christmas card in the mail and got home, and lost it again. It took me about 3 days of feeling like a zombie to have some normalcy... even then, I still don't feel normal and its been almost 2 weeks. I feel like i'm just kinda going in and out of my days. I'll have some days where I'm fine...then I'll have other days where I think "why the hell are we doing this!??!" and I KNOW 100% that we're doing this to better ourselves and our future... and I am SO proud of my husband for doing this... but good Lord is it hard. I didn't think it would be this difficult. Like I said, some days I'm fine. Some days I'm really not.
I got my first phone call from him last Tuesday. Christmas Day. BEST. CHRISTMAS. PRESENT. EVER. God I missed his voice. even though i have his voice mail, it was nice to hear him tell me "i love you too" back. hahaha. voicemails don't talk back to you. much to my dismay. lol. We talked about this and that...he told me how the first few days he regretted going in, but that its gotten better. He still sounded awful (had a cold when he left), and i told him to go to sick call the next day to get a cold pack. I really hope he listened. He said he would, but you know men...they like to try to be the hero. lol. We talked about a lot and we talked about nothing. i think we were both just glad to hear each others' voices. The hardest part was the saying goodbye. After he hung up, I broke down. I am so happy i heard from him, but at the same time, it made it THAT MUCH HARDER to bear. As i'm in the middle of my breakdown, he called me back...and I immediately attempted to dry it up so i could sound strong for him...which is what everyone said to do. everyone told me not to cry on the phone. I did good. until i picked up the phone that time and heard him crying. OH. MY. GOD. I have never felt so heartbroken in my life. For a man that has never cried, that was hard to hear. He said he talked to his mom and she started crying so he lost it and he really wanted to hear my voice again before his time ended. broke. my. heart. Guh. i'm tearing up just thinking about it.
I spent the rest of the night curled up in my bed crying trying to be positive. Man was it hard. I woke up the next morning really not feeling well, but I had to go to work. I worked only from 10-1 and tried to be really positive. Dropped off a letter to the post office, came home...did Insanity (stupidest mistake ever)...and just spent the rest of the evening quietly on the computer. Thursday went to work from 7-1230 and felt AWFUL the entire time. I think this was when i realized I was getting a bug. i was nauseated, felt extremely tired, and just bleh. Got off, went home, curled up in bed. I went and got my hair trimmed around 3, at which point we discussed my hair color that we're gonna be doing before I go for his graduation! SO EXCITED! Then, Friday and Saturday I was feeling soooo sick. I caught a bug or something. it was nasty. i barely ate anything on Friday. I couldn't keep it down, didn't have an appetite, ect... idk. it was rough. lol. Saturday I did a little bit better... I was still feeling really sick, but i was keeping food down. My dad, sister, and I went to pick out our new mattresses and bed sets, which was fun...but by the end of it I just really wanted to go to bed. haha.
Now to today. Its been 13 days since my husband left. I'm feeling a little bit better about the whole thing...(and i'm doing a bit better sick wise)... I've had my moments, but I'm really thankful that my husband is doing what he is for our family. Its gonna be a hard transition, but it will all be worth it. Its already been 2 weeks since he left, and the remaining 6.5 will go by just as fast. I write to him every night and feel like I'm spending time with him in that way. I'm *HOPING* that he will get to call home today, but I'm not expecting it. He just called home last Tuesday...so I expect not to get another phone call until next week. I will probably be updating my blog a little more often than i used to...and now its mainly going to be where I come to tell of my experiences during this time... From what I've been reading, posting it really helps...not to mention it gives me something else to do. lol.
Sorry for the long post! For now I'm done. I hope all of you had a very Merry Christmas and will have a Happy New year! :D
May 2013 be full of happiness and love!
~Bethany~
before he left