Okay just fair warning, today i'm gonna sound like Mrs. Debbie Downer, mainly because its been rough and I need to vent and cry. Its okay to cry every once and a while, isnt it?
Today was the first day I have EVER sobbed during a workout. I had to pause it at one point just to catch my breath cuz i felt like i was going to hyperventilate. But I learned something important today, thanks to my husband. Excuses will get the best of us if we let them. We gotta push through them.
I have felt useless today. Just exhausted to the point where i felt like all my limbs were made of lead and i was dragging my feet. I have NO IDEA what has caused this feeling, and I don't like it. I get it sometimes at work towards the end of the day, but i've never experienced that on the weekends, mainly because i tend to not really do much except for laundry and grocery shop. But today I woke up with an awful migrane and that just set the mood for the rest of the day.
As you all know, I do Insanity Sunday-Friday, with Saturdays being my rest day. Well, last week? I did it Sun, Mon, Tuesday, then was sick Wed-Friday. So i have gone 4 days without doing it. that did NOT help me when it came time to do it today. I usually do it right when i get up because I know i'll talk myself out of it later in the day if i don't. Well, unfortunately, today I woke up with a migrane which I have to eat toast, drink something, and take medicine. which takes time. it took an hour and a half before that medicine kicked in. By that time? It was already 930a. I usually go to the store at 11.
I, instead of doing Insanity once the medicine kicked in, decided to read and finish laundry that i didn't finish yesterday. Then i had used the excuse "well i just ate, so i'll probably throw up." Daniel just shook his head and said "you're gonna regret this later." yeah. i did.
around noon my dad and i went to the store. I was dragging my feet the whole time. I felt and feel awful still. we got our groceries, and by the time we got home I was starving, in an ill mood, blood sugar was dropping, ect. that was 2p. It took Daniel an hour and a half to convince me to get off my ass and do Insanity. He had to force me up, tell me i had to go get dressed, and basically do everything but force me to do the moves. Am I ashamed? yes. I am ashamed at how i've been today, but i don't really know what it is. I feel like someone has drugged me and made me feel so out of it. I haven't taken anything other than sudafed and B12 which BOTH are supposed to perk you up. (sudafed for my headache).
There was one point during the dvd where i just sat on the floor and said "i give up" and i just started sobbing because i had no idea what else to do. I felt like i was chained to the floor, felt like i couldn't get up. Daniel said "i'm trying to have faith in you. Please. get up. do it. you wont regret it. I love you. You need to break the cycle." He said that if I didnt do it that i was falling into my old patterns of quitting because i didn't feel like it...making excuses because I was tired and just didn't want to do it...He was telling me the truth.
Everytime I start a new "regimen" for working out, i do it really well for a few weeks, then i slack...something ALWAYS comes up. I get "sick," or i have this or that going on, or plain 'I just dont want to anymore." every. single. time. I give up. I say "its impossible to go on, i'm never going to lose this weight." "I'm sick, this must be a sign I shouldn't keep this up." "I just don't really care anymore." ect ect. same old bullshit, same old Bethany.
but today I hit a breaking point. Thanks to my wonderful husband, i powered through. I sobbed though most of it, and once it was over I broke down. But this time i broke down because i broke through the shield of the past. I broke through and kept going. i have never felt so ashamed. i have never felt so liberated.
All this being said, i think i'll be able to do it no matter what now. i know i can do it when i feel chained to the ground. sorry for the debbie downer vibe today. just...not feeling it. its been a roller coaster of a day.
thats all for now.
hope ya'll had a great weekend.
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Thursday, September 6, 2012
True Colors
You wanna know something I've always wanted to do? Run.
I've always "hated it." But what a lot of people don't know is that I used to be and still am the person that, even though I say I hate it, I secretly long to be able to do it. As you have all seen, I've been attempting to get in shape through insanity (which will work, if i can stick with it. 12 days down, 51 to go). Well I've seen a lot of my friends running this 5k and that...and well i want to be one of those.
Well theres this website, Skinny Ms., that is having a contest. They are giving away 4 tickets to any color run in the US and by golly, i'm going for it. I think this particular 5k would be fun and would keep me going because who doesn't want to get covered from head to toe in a rainbow? LOL Plus, theres a few locations that aren't far from home, so we wouldn't have to fork over a bunch of cash for lodging/gas/ect. Heres the link to the contest for those of you who are also interested in entering. http://skinnyms.com/contest.
Even if I don't win the four pack of tickets, I could still win some great prizes from Skinny Ms like a cookbook (i could always use more recipes!), and a 12 week program that i could do in between Insanity rounds! :)
If you haven't like Skinny Ms on facebook, you need to, btw. They always post fantastic recipes and tips. I've tried a few of them. :)
But anyways, thats about all I have for today. Just got done with Day 12 of Insanity and I'm BEAT. now if I can just go get my shower and head to work.
have a great day!
I've always "hated it." But what a lot of people don't know is that I used to be and still am the person that, even though I say I hate it, I secretly long to be able to do it. As you have all seen, I've been attempting to get in shape through insanity (which will work, if i can stick with it. 12 days down, 51 to go). Well I've seen a lot of my friends running this 5k and that...and well i want to be one of those.
Well theres this website, Skinny Ms., that is having a contest. They are giving away 4 tickets to any color run in the US and by golly, i'm going for it. I think this particular 5k would be fun and would keep me going because who doesn't want to get covered from head to toe in a rainbow? LOL Plus, theres a few locations that aren't far from home, so we wouldn't have to fork over a bunch of cash for lodging/gas/ect. Heres the link to the contest for those of you who are also interested in entering. http://skinnyms.com/contest.
Even if I don't win the four pack of tickets, I could still win some great prizes from Skinny Ms like a cookbook (i could always use more recipes!), and a 12 week program that i could do in between Insanity rounds! :)
If you haven't like Skinny Ms on facebook, you need to, btw. They always post fantastic recipes and tips. I've tried a few of them. :)
But anyways, thats about all I have for today. Just got done with Day 12 of Insanity and I'm BEAT. now if I can just go get my shower and head to work.
have a great day!
Monday, September 3, 2012
Sometimes Seeing Is Believing
If you were ever like me, you know what i'm talking about. You sit on your ass on the couch and watch TV. An infomercial comes on and you see "how much weight you can lose" or "how to get a six-pack" ect ect...and you're like "oooh i want that, it will help..." then as you get older you notice that some of the pictures...well they look off...and you start to think that that is just a gimmick. another thing USA wants to do to get more money.
Well, I used to think that about Insanity. I was like "that will never work." or "hah. that totally looks fake!" ect ect. BUT after doing one week? I already see a difference and feel a difference. I know its not a hype. IT WORKS...especially if you eat right and push yourself without hurting yourself.
In one week I've noticed my endurance has gotten better, I want to push myself that extra set, ect. I've also noticed that clothes are starting to fit me better. I have this one pair of jean capris that I wear to work all the time..and usually after I wash them they are SUPER tight on me. Well, i put those suckers on right out of the dryer on saturday and they fit perfectly, in fact they were kinda loose. So i was curious. I measured my waist, hips, and chest just to see....at first I couldn't believe what i was seeing. I had lost 1.5" off my waist, 1.25" off my chest, and 0.5" off my hips. O.O i was like "WHAT?!?! is that even possible?!" apparently it is. I also weighed myself and I'm down 3lbs since last Sunday. I'm not gonna say an official weight until this coming sunday when I do my fit test again...same thing with the measurements. I just wanted to see because, like i said, my clothes were fitting better and it was weird!
Something I have noticed the past two days I've been off and done Insanity is that if i eat a meal the night before that is bad for you (junk food Saturday night, Chili's last night) i have INSANE heartburn during my workout. Thats always lovely. I was like 'seriously? come on!!!" lol but other than that, its been good. Not really looking forward to tomorrow. its Plyometrics and I am already learning to hate Plyo and its only day 2 of week 2. (day 9).
But anyways I just thought I'd share my success so far. Its crazy! I'll post my results side by side next Sunday. :)
see ya'll later! have a safe Labor Day!
Well, I used to think that about Insanity. I was like "that will never work." or "hah. that totally looks fake!" ect ect. BUT after doing one week? I already see a difference and feel a difference. I know its not a hype. IT WORKS...especially if you eat right and push yourself without hurting yourself.
In one week I've noticed my endurance has gotten better, I want to push myself that extra set, ect. I've also noticed that clothes are starting to fit me better. I have this one pair of jean capris that I wear to work all the time..and usually after I wash them they are SUPER tight on me. Well, i put those suckers on right out of the dryer on saturday and they fit perfectly, in fact they were kinda loose. So i was curious. I measured my waist, hips, and chest just to see....at first I couldn't believe what i was seeing. I had lost 1.5" off my waist, 1.25" off my chest, and 0.5" off my hips. O.O i was like "WHAT?!?! is that even possible?!" apparently it is. I also weighed myself and I'm down 3lbs since last Sunday. I'm not gonna say an official weight until this coming sunday when I do my fit test again...same thing with the measurements. I just wanted to see because, like i said, my clothes were fitting better and it was weird!
Something I have noticed the past two days I've been off and done Insanity is that if i eat a meal the night before that is bad for you (junk food Saturday night, Chili's last night) i have INSANE heartburn during my workout. Thats always lovely. I was like 'seriously? come on!!!" lol but other than that, its been good. Not really looking forward to tomorrow. its Plyometrics and I am already learning to hate Plyo and its only day 2 of week 2. (day 9).
But anyways I just thought I'd share my success so far. Its crazy! I'll post my results side by side next Sunday. :)
see ya'll later! have a safe Labor Day!
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Dig Deeper
As I mentioned in my last blog, I wanted to start INSANITY. Well, now i have. I am officially on Day 4 of Insanity! (Already did my workout, tomorrow will be day 5). I am enjoying it thoroughly. While it is excruciating in some portions (for my weak ankles/wrists), I still enjoy it. I know i'm working my butt off. Literally. lol. I have decided not to count calories while i do so, but just pay attention to what i'm eating and how much. If i start to try counting calories i'm going to go crazy because I have NO IDEA how many i'm burning.... so yea. I need to get a heart rate monitor, but they're expensive.
I am doing it alone this first time. Mainly because i'm doing it at the house and there is NO ROOM. Also because I am out of shape and I want to go through a round by myself before I try to do it with anyone else. Daniel has been getting up with me so he can cheer me on while i do it, and that helps me keep going. Another thing that i've found that really helps is the Gatorade stuff. Daniel thinks I'm silly for believing in it, but whatever. I use the PRIME and RECOVER formulas. the Prime is great. it has B vitamins to help you power through your workout. The Recover is the perfect ratio of Carbs::protein that you need to recover from a workout. I usually drink half a bottle of the recover mixed with a small amount of water (its really syrupy). Its helped me out a lot I think. daniel thinks its bogus, but he says whatever gets me to do it and feel good about myself. :)
Also, a new thing started at work this week. They are allowing us a 10-minute break. They come in and cover us while we go take a break...I think i'm going to start utilizing this 10 minute break to have my snack. I'm gonna start bringing an apple, banana, granola bar, ect...and use that 10 minutes to eat and go potty. I think that will help me out A LOT. I hope they keep doing it. Its an awesome system. It will keep me from eating the kids food because instead of trying to wolf down a small granola bar in like 1 minute hiding in the room, I will get to sit, eat my snack, and drink plenty of water with it. Granola bars don't last very long if you don't have any water with it. :)
I have figured out that I will finish with Insanity on October 20. That will be the end of Round 1. I will then proceed to swimming, starting strength, and running. :) If i keep this up, I will be starting a second round of Insanity in December/January. by that time, I will have a little more time on my hands and hopefully have a ton more endurance and strength. :) not to mention be down a little in weight! lol
My goals for Insanity:
Lose 15lbs
Gain endurance
Gain strength
Gain energy
I am doing it alone this first time. Mainly because i'm doing it at the house and there is NO ROOM. Also because I am out of shape and I want to go through a round by myself before I try to do it with anyone else. Daniel has been getting up with me so he can cheer me on while i do it, and that helps me keep going. Another thing that i've found that really helps is the Gatorade stuff. Daniel thinks I'm silly for believing in it, but whatever. I use the PRIME and RECOVER formulas. the Prime is great. it has B vitamins to help you power through your workout. The Recover is the perfect ratio of Carbs::protein that you need to recover from a workout. I usually drink half a bottle of the recover mixed with a small amount of water (its really syrupy). Its helped me out a lot I think. daniel thinks its bogus, but he says whatever gets me to do it and feel good about myself. :)
Also, a new thing started at work this week. They are allowing us a 10-minute break. They come in and cover us while we go take a break...I think i'm going to start utilizing this 10 minute break to have my snack. I'm gonna start bringing an apple, banana, granola bar, ect...and use that 10 minutes to eat and go potty. I think that will help me out A LOT. I hope they keep doing it. Its an awesome system. It will keep me from eating the kids food because instead of trying to wolf down a small granola bar in like 1 minute hiding in the room, I will get to sit, eat my snack, and drink plenty of water with it. Granola bars don't last very long if you don't have any water with it. :)
I have figured out that I will finish with Insanity on October 20. That will be the end of Round 1. I will then proceed to swimming, starting strength, and running. :) If i keep this up, I will be starting a second round of Insanity in December/January. by that time, I will have a little more time on my hands and hopefully have a ton more endurance and strength. :) not to mention be down a little in weight! lol
My goals for Insanity:
Lose 15lbs
Gain endurance
Gain strength
Gain energy
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Pure Insanity.
Okay. So, some things have changed since my last blog, but not a lot. Daniel's date (what we thought was November 19 is now December 18)...so thats a good change. I've had a lot of things and stress dealing with work and money and stuff, but some of that will start subsiding now. *i hope*
I also have come to the conclusion that I make excuses. A lot. "I don't feel good" or "that took too long, so i'm not going" or "i just don't want to." I'm tired of my crap. lol. I'm a b**** at home because of stress and stuff... I mean I get stressed out over the effing cars. Like seriously? When did a parking space matter? NEVER. Good grief. I do NOT like what i've been turning into. I think a lot of it has to do with 4 major things:
1) Stress at work
2) Stress at home
3) Stress over money
4) My temper
While I've gotten a tad better about my temper since marrying Daniel, I still let it get the best of me sometimes and I hate it. I believe a lot of this stress is about to change and make it to where I'm not so tired, sick, irritable, ect... I think the stress i've been under for the last 4 months is why i've been so sick...and why i'm always exhausted. What i've learned is that stress IS exhausting. I don't need to live like this! OMG I'M GOING TO DIE AT 35 IF I KEEP THIS UP! lol so here is why i believe things are getting better.
1) Daniel got a job. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. HALLELUJAH! That will help with the money stress. CHECK.
2) I'm starting in a new classroom (tomorrow actually...) with a lead who is pretty down to earth. so there goes my work stress *hopefully*. CHECK
3) I've been working on trying to calm myself. "Meditating" when i can. i'm not really sure how to do it... but i've been attempting for a few days...while my temper can sometimes just come out of nowhere, I think i've finally figured out when it starts to flare and I end up turning around and walking out of the situation...whilst that can cause other issues (because when i walk away with my temper, I tend to walk a bit heavier and shut doors a tad bit harder...whoops) it makes me step away from whatever caused it to flare up, realize i was being a crazy b**** and go back and apologize once i've calmed myself down....a few more weeks like that and MAYBE i wont lose my temper in the first place....who knows...unfortunately i think thats something i'm always going to be fighting, but...you live with what God has given...and you learn to tame your inner evil. lol
I've come to the conclusion that the stress at home wont really go away until Daniel and I move. Theres just too many people living here. I'm soo thankful for my parents and all they've done for us, and we would be out on the streets if they hadn't come up with this solution. That being said, nobody ever anticipated 3 families living under one roof. While it is great to have CJ and Megs around and not all the way in freaking Utah, its gonna put more stress on everyone. Including Meg and CJ. Its inevitable. Theres just too many personalities, lifestyles, feelings, ect involved and its crazy. NOW THAT BEING SAID, there are things we could and will start doing soon that will help ease some of the tensions and stress and all that....so...HOPEFULLY things will start slowly getting better...if not.. welll.....its only temporary. ;) lol
Now that i've gotten all the nasty business about why i haven't been so hard on myself when i don't do so well on my eating....lol...lets get to the part that i started this blog for in the first place. my weight.
Despite all this, I haven't done too terribly bad eating/drinking wise. I've been doing pretty well actually...aside from a trip to Chili's with my bestie and daniel, and i think fast food twice over the last couple weeks... but i'm really proud of myself. I have been good about what i drink. REALLY GOOD. I had a coke yesterday at lunch (on accident, you get in a habit of ordering something and i was in a hurry so i ordered it and left and was like CRAP)...but aside from that, i've only had my morning coffee, a fruit protein smoothie and WATER to drink every day for the last week now. Thats a feat, especially for me because I used to be the girl who would drink 6-8 cokes a day, sweet tea, juice, ect. i'm so stinking proud of myself.
So that being said, I would like to say that i am unofficially joining Team beachbody (i say unofficially because i'm not actually signing up for it, just doing the workout)...and starting Insanity. I probably wont start it until next Friday....or even possibly September 7...it just depends...i gotta figure out whats gonna work best with the things i'm going to have going on over the next few months...but i'm starting it. its not gonna be easy. its going to be damn hard. but Ash wants to do it, daniel said he'd do it with me, and both of my sisters said they want to try it too...so i have a pretty large support group to help me out. :) not to mention Daniel's friends Parker, Nathan, Ian, and Dillon are all doing it too...soooo yeah. we have the dvd's thanks to my amazing father in law and so i'm going to do it. I don't have to drive to do it...so...i think i can keep that up a bit easier than getting up early to drive to the gym, work out, drive back, and shower. :)
So now comes to the questions. I need to know, how much sleep do i need to be getting? I read differently all over the place... some say 7.5, some say 8, some even say 10. I need to know. right now i'm going to bed between 930 and 1030...and waking up around 6 and falling back to sleep until 650 or 7. so thats about 8.5 to 10hours every night...and i have an extremely hard time getting out of bed in the mornings. that needs to stop.
next quesiton. how can i get myself to wake up faster? is there anything i can do that will help me to get my butt out of bed? or is that sheer willpower?
I'm so tired of being TIRED...and again i say--that may change once i start exercising again, and sleeping the correct amount and my stress at work and with money starts to diminish.
Anyways. I guess i'm done...but if you have any tips you'd like to share or recipes or any kind of comment--feel free to post or message me on fb. :)
this is my mantra for Insanity. lol
hope you guys have a good night!
I also have come to the conclusion that I make excuses. A lot. "I don't feel good" or "that took too long, so i'm not going" or "i just don't want to." I'm tired of my crap. lol. I'm a b**** at home because of stress and stuff... I mean I get stressed out over the effing cars. Like seriously? When did a parking space matter? NEVER. Good grief. I do NOT like what i've been turning into. I think a lot of it has to do with 4 major things:
1) Stress at work
2) Stress at home
3) Stress over money
4) My temper
While I've gotten a tad better about my temper since marrying Daniel, I still let it get the best of me sometimes and I hate it. I believe a lot of this stress is about to change and make it to where I'm not so tired, sick, irritable, ect... I think the stress i've been under for the last 4 months is why i've been so sick...and why i'm always exhausted. What i've learned is that stress IS exhausting. I don't need to live like this! OMG I'M GOING TO DIE AT 35 IF I KEEP THIS UP! lol so here is why i believe things are getting better.
1) Daniel got a job. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. HALLELUJAH! That will help with the money stress. CHECK.
2) I'm starting in a new classroom (tomorrow actually...) with a lead who is pretty down to earth. so there goes my work stress *hopefully*. CHECK
3) I've been working on trying to calm myself. "Meditating" when i can. i'm not really sure how to do it... but i've been attempting for a few days...while my temper can sometimes just come out of nowhere, I think i've finally figured out when it starts to flare and I end up turning around and walking out of the situation...whilst that can cause other issues (because when i walk away with my temper, I tend to walk a bit heavier and shut doors a tad bit harder...whoops) it makes me step away from whatever caused it to flare up, realize i was being a crazy b**** and go back and apologize once i've calmed myself down....a few more weeks like that and MAYBE i wont lose my temper in the first place....who knows...unfortunately i think thats something i'm always going to be fighting, but...you live with what God has given...and you learn to tame your inner evil. lol
I've come to the conclusion that the stress at home wont really go away until Daniel and I move. Theres just too many people living here. I'm soo thankful for my parents and all they've done for us, and we would be out on the streets if they hadn't come up with this solution. That being said, nobody ever anticipated 3 families living under one roof. While it is great to have CJ and Megs around and not all the way in freaking Utah, its gonna put more stress on everyone. Including Meg and CJ. Its inevitable. Theres just too many personalities, lifestyles, feelings, ect involved and its crazy. NOW THAT BEING SAID, there are things we could and will start doing soon that will help ease some of the tensions and stress and all that....so...HOPEFULLY things will start slowly getting better...if not.. welll.....its only temporary. ;) lol
Now that i've gotten all the nasty business about why i haven't been so hard on myself when i don't do so well on my eating....lol...lets get to the part that i started this blog for in the first place. my weight.
Despite all this, I haven't done too terribly bad eating/drinking wise. I've been doing pretty well actually...aside from a trip to Chili's with my bestie and daniel, and i think fast food twice over the last couple weeks... but i'm really proud of myself. I have been good about what i drink. REALLY GOOD. I had a coke yesterday at lunch (on accident, you get in a habit of ordering something and i was in a hurry so i ordered it and left and was like CRAP)...but aside from that, i've only had my morning coffee, a fruit protein smoothie and WATER to drink every day for the last week now. Thats a feat, especially for me because I used to be the girl who would drink 6-8 cokes a day, sweet tea, juice, ect. i'm so stinking proud of myself.
So that being said, I would like to say that i am unofficially joining Team beachbody (i say unofficially because i'm not actually signing up for it, just doing the workout)...and starting Insanity. I probably wont start it until next Friday....or even possibly September 7...it just depends...i gotta figure out whats gonna work best with the things i'm going to have going on over the next few months...but i'm starting it. its not gonna be easy. its going to be damn hard. but Ash wants to do it, daniel said he'd do it with me, and both of my sisters said they want to try it too...so i have a pretty large support group to help me out. :) not to mention Daniel's friends Parker, Nathan, Ian, and Dillon are all doing it too...soooo yeah. we have the dvd's thanks to my amazing father in law and so i'm going to do it. I don't have to drive to do it...so...i think i can keep that up a bit easier than getting up early to drive to the gym, work out, drive back, and shower. :)
So now comes to the questions. I need to know, how much sleep do i need to be getting? I read differently all over the place... some say 7.5, some say 8, some even say 10. I need to know. right now i'm going to bed between 930 and 1030...and waking up around 6 and falling back to sleep until 650 or 7. so thats about 8.5 to 10hours every night...and i have an extremely hard time getting out of bed in the mornings. that needs to stop.
next quesiton. how can i get myself to wake up faster? is there anything i can do that will help me to get my butt out of bed? or is that sheer willpower?
I'm so tired of being TIRED...and again i say--that may change once i start exercising again, and sleeping the correct amount and my stress at work and with money starts to diminish.
Anyways. I guess i'm done...but if you have any tips you'd like to share or recipes or any kind of comment--feel free to post or message me on fb. :)
this is my mantra for Insanity. lolWednesday, July 18, 2012
Another Year Gone
Wow. I cannot believe I'm turning 22 on Friday. It seems like just yesterday I was 17 and foolish and freshly out of high school and fresh off a trip to Colorado. Now I'm turning 22, have an amazing husband, plans for our future, and a plan to change my lifestyle. Daniel will be going to BMT on November 19, 2012. Yes. You read right. That is the MONDAY OF THANKSGIVING. While I was originally really pissed at that fact (and the fact that he will miss our 3rd wedding anniversary, christmas, the new year, AND Valentine's Day), I have finally come to terms *for the most part* with this. I am glad we have a date, I wish it could be a different date, but....whatever--God has done this for a reason.
I guess a lot will be changing over the next year...so theres no telling where I'll be or what Daniel and I will be up to this time next year. Its crazy to think about because I don't even know where we will be in a year...like...literally. It could be ANYWHERE on the planet. I'm *hoping* for stateside...just because it would make visiting family and friends a TON easier, but I'm fine with whatever. It will be hard either way though. But its going to be an adventure and I'm SO excited that I have Daniel to share this adventure with. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love him with all my heart, soul, and mind. People talk about soulmates, and Daniel literally is my other half. Butttt enough of me being sappy sappy. lol.
I'm kinda mad I have to work on Friday.... well not really that i have to work, but that I had asked off and got it approved like a month after starting this job...then about a month ago, they came and told me I had to change it and "sorry we approved it, but we added more blackout dates." Life. -.- Kinda over it...but at the same time, still it irks me. So i work my full day *hopefully getting off around 5-515* then *hopefully* going to Olive Garden and a movie with my wonderful husband. I told him I want a chill evening. I usually would want to dress up and all that fancy schmancy romantic shtuff. not this birthday. maybe next birthday. this birthday i just want chill. jeans. tshirt. yeah.... Saturday we're gonna go see his parents. and Sunday its off to bham for my mom's parents' 50th wedding anniversary. 47 more years for Daniel and I til we hit that huge landmark. ;) wont seem so long with this amazing man i've found.
anyways. I've done a lot of blabbing. lol. as for my diet (which is why i started this blog) its just kinda slowly going. I'm not really losing, but Daniel and I aren't really vegan... we're like... 40% vegan... we probably will never be 100%...but we'll be closer than we are now...probably more like 85%-90%. lol. but as for right now, theres just too much going on and we don't really have enough money to cover going vegan more than that. lol. what we're doing now is about breaking the bank. stupid healthy food being more expensive. meh, it happens. We'll be able to afford more once everything gets situated. lol.
but yea...so...life goes by fast...and its funny because it used to seem like the years went soo slowly...but now they are here then gone and its a new one and you're stuck sitting there staring going "wow...its already July, almost August? Dang.."
anyways. thats all cuz i'm starting to ramble because i'm exhausted. i'll write more eventually.
adios
I guess a lot will be changing over the next year...so theres no telling where I'll be or what Daniel and I will be up to this time next year. Its crazy to think about because I don't even know where we will be in a year...like...literally. It could be ANYWHERE on the planet. I'm *hoping* for stateside...just because it would make visiting family and friends a TON easier, but I'm fine with whatever. It will be hard either way though. But its going to be an adventure and I'm SO excited that I have Daniel to share this adventure with. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love him with all my heart, soul, and mind. People talk about soulmates, and Daniel literally is my other half. Butttt enough of me being sappy sappy. lol.
I'm kinda mad I have to work on Friday.... well not really that i have to work, but that I had asked off and got it approved like a month after starting this job...then about a month ago, they came and told me I had to change it and "sorry we approved it, but we added more blackout dates." Life. -.- Kinda over it...but at the same time, still it irks me. So i work my full day *hopefully getting off around 5-515* then *hopefully* going to Olive Garden and a movie with my wonderful husband. I told him I want a chill evening. I usually would want to dress up and all that fancy schmancy romantic shtuff. not this birthday. maybe next birthday. this birthday i just want chill. jeans. tshirt. yeah.... Saturday we're gonna go see his parents. and Sunday its off to bham for my mom's parents' 50th wedding anniversary. 47 more years for Daniel and I til we hit that huge landmark. ;) wont seem so long with this amazing man i've found.
anyways. I've done a lot of blabbing. lol. as for my diet (which is why i started this blog) its just kinda slowly going. I'm not really losing, but Daniel and I aren't really vegan... we're like... 40% vegan... we probably will never be 100%...but we'll be closer than we are now...probably more like 85%-90%. lol. but as for right now, theres just too much going on and we don't really have enough money to cover going vegan more than that. lol. what we're doing now is about breaking the bank. stupid healthy food being more expensive. meh, it happens. We'll be able to afford more once everything gets situated. lol.
but yea...so...life goes by fast...and its funny because it used to seem like the years went soo slowly...but now they are here then gone and its a new one and you're stuck sitting there staring going "wow...its already July, almost August? Dang.."
anyways. thats all cuz i'm starting to ramble because i'm exhausted. i'll write more eventually.
adios
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Holidays and Birthdays
oh man. this ones a doozie.
So...as you all know from my facebook posts and my last blog, Daniel and I have started eating a whole foods plant based diet (which from now on will just be WFPBD to save me some time). Well, as you know, today is July 4th, 2012. Happy Independence Day to all of you and yours btw! So today is usually about grilling out burgers, hot dogs, ribs, ect ect...spending time with family... well none of us wanted to cook, we just wanted to chill. So we went to Logan's.
Logans is fantastic. Btw. I love their steak. So I got a steak, baked potato, house salad with ranch and had a potato skin, a wing, and half a mozzarella stick. (and of course, a couple rolls). I ate about 6 bites of steak, 4 bites of potato, most of my salad....2 rolls...a wing, potato skin, and half a mozzarella stick. omg. i feel so sick to my stomach. like...i felt fine...until my steak was brought out...then i was like "oh my word." so word of wisdom to all those out there trying to eat better--don't do what i did.
I got my normal. My normal isn't normal for me anymore...so naturally my stomach is like "WTF uh-uh!" its gonna be a long night. So now its got me thinking "oh crap, my birthday is in 2 weeks...what am i gonna do?" NOT EAT AS MUCH. idk what got into me tonight...i went in saying "oh i wont eat that much"....but i guess it didn't seem like that much until the steak got there and then i was like "crap. now what?" lol. it happens...not gonna go beating myself up over it..just gonna know for next time...lol.
On a good note, i am seeing a difference (probably wont tomorrow, but whatever...i will friday. haha). So at the beginning of June, I was stuck at 250lbs. even. for like...3 weeks. never budging. always 250.0. I am proud to say that as of yesterday morning, I am at 246.8. That is just after one week of eating the WFPBD the best i can and cutting out most dairy, if not all. AND I talked to Sheryl (my boss) last night at the staff meeting and she said she was going to come up with a way for me to be able to step out of the classroom and eat a small snack so I am not tempted to eat the kids food anymore. I wanted to talk to her after the staff meeting because its calmer than attempting to talk during a hectic busy workday. I should find out tomorrow what I can do about that...So that makes me feel better. I can start bringing small plant based snacks that are dense and low in calories so it will get me all the way til 130. I have a feeling I will probably be allowed to eat it around 1030-1130. 1030 is when we come in from outside, 1130 is when the kids eat lunch. She started to say it was okay for me to eat carrots and stuff while the kids ate their lunch, but then I was like "i thought we couldn't eat our own food in front of the kids?!" and so she told me she'd figure something out by Thursday and let me know. I'm bringing a snack with me tomorrow just in case. ;) tomorrow is water day too...which means its gonna be nice and hot and i'm gonna be starving by the time we get back inside. lol.
I look forward to the next few months...learning what to do what not to do, making a difference in Daniel and my lives, my family's lives, our overall health. I've learned some great recipes already, and really enjoy them...(in fact tomorrow i'm making one from vegkitchen.com called Black Bean and Zucchini Tortilla Casserole)........however, I need some more breakfast recipes..I'm kinda getting tired of the oatmeal. i like it...but not every day kind of like it. LOL. maybe i'll start alternating that with a protein shake or something...... who knows(OH if any of you wanna get me a bday present, Everyday Happy Herbivore, 30 Minutes or Less Vegan.... actually, any vegan cookbook would be nice. LOL!!! just saying.... or money. money is always appreciated. LOL. )
anyways. i think i'm gonna go curl up in my bed, read my book and then listen to fireworks. This is my first *chill* fourth. i usually try to do something, but i've REALLY enjoyed just relaxing...would have been more relaxing if it was at the beach......but doesn't that go for all of us? lol.
I hope ya'll all had a safe and happy 4th. Enjoy the rest of your week!
OHH and if you have any good bfast ideas or recipes, message me or comment! I'm willing to do anything at this point.
So...as you all know from my facebook posts and my last blog, Daniel and I have started eating a whole foods plant based diet (which from now on will just be WFPBD to save me some time). Well, as you know, today is July 4th, 2012. Happy Independence Day to all of you and yours btw! So today is usually about grilling out burgers, hot dogs, ribs, ect ect...spending time with family... well none of us wanted to cook, we just wanted to chill. So we went to Logan's.
Logans is fantastic. Btw. I love their steak. So I got a steak, baked potato, house salad with ranch and had a potato skin, a wing, and half a mozzarella stick. (and of course, a couple rolls). I ate about 6 bites of steak, 4 bites of potato, most of my salad....2 rolls...a wing, potato skin, and half a mozzarella stick. omg. i feel so sick to my stomach. like...i felt fine...until my steak was brought out...then i was like "oh my word." so word of wisdom to all those out there trying to eat better--don't do what i did.
I got my normal. My normal isn't normal for me anymore...so naturally my stomach is like "WTF uh-uh!" its gonna be a long night. So now its got me thinking "oh crap, my birthday is in 2 weeks...what am i gonna do?" NOT EAT AS MUCH. idk what got into me tonight...i went in saying "oh i wont eat that much"....but i guess it didn't seem like that much until the steak got there and then i was like "crap. now what?" lol. it happens...not gonna go beating myself up over it..just gonna know for next time...lol.
On a good note, i am seeing a difference (probably wont tomorrow, but whatever...i will friday. haha). So at the beginning of June, I was stuck at 250lbs. even. for like...3 weeks. never budging. always 250.0. I am proud to say that as of yesterday morning, I am at 246.8. That is just after one week of eating the WFPBD the best i can and cutting out most dairy, if not all. AND I talked to Sheryl (my boss) last night at the staff meeting and she said she was going to come up with a way for me to be able to step out of the classroom and eat a small snack so I am not tempted to eat the kids food anymore. I wanted to talk to her after the staff meeting because its calmer than attempting to talk during a hectic busy workday. I should find out tomorrow what I can do about that...So that makes me feel better. I can start bringing small plant based snacks that are dense and low in calories so it will get me all the way til 130. I have a feeling I will probably be allowed to eat it around 1030-1130. 1030 is when we come in from outside, 1130 is when the kids eat lunch. She started to say it was okay for me to eat carrots and stuff while the kids ate their lunch, but then I was like "i thought we couldn't eat our own food in front of the kids?!" and so she told me she'd figure something out by Thursday and let me know. I'm bringing a snack with me tomorrow just in case. ;) tomorrow is water day too...which means its gonna be nice and hot and i'm gonna be starving by the time we get back inside. lol.
I look forward to the next few months...learning what to do what not to do, making a difference in Daniel and my lives, my family's lives, our overall health. I've learned some great recipes already, and really enjoy them...(in fact tomorrow i'm making one from vegkitchen.com called Black Bean and Zucchini Tortilla Casserole)........however, I need some more breakfast recipes..I'm kinda getting tired of the oatmeal. i like it...but not every day kind of like it. LOL. maybe i'll start alternating that with a protein shake or something...... who knows(OH if any of you wanna get me a bday present, Everyday Happy Herbivore, 30 Minutes or Less Vegan.... actually, any vegan cookbook would be nice. LOL!!! just saying.... or money. money is always appreciated. LOL. )
anyways. i think i'm gonna go curl up in my bed, read my book and then listen to fireworks. This is my first *chill* fourth. i usually try to do something, but i've REALLY enjoyed just relaxing...would have been more relaxing if it was at the beach......but doesn't that go for all of us? lol.
I hope ya'll all had a safe and happy 4th. Enjoy the rest of your week!
OHH and if you have any good bfast ideas or recipes, message me or comment! I'm willing to do anything at this point.
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